lundi 23 juillet 2007

Fullness of Life not avoiding not denying and accepting

What does abundance mean to you?

this is what we've been asked at virtual circle

Abundance is a strange word to me I rarely use.
All I know is that I get it sometimes.It is like waves,phases of beautiful gentle waves back to me...as if anytime when the tide went back and I was so alone,desperate and the sand all dry...I could still hope,stand still and wait for the next tide to come back to me.
I saw at the first answer by another spiritual seeker she talked about the flow!
that's it totally.
nothing more than this.
and as another Priestress said" what you resist persist" people can read, people can understand but they won't apply it to their life.
they will just say it's beautiful thinking. why not then trying to living this way?

Anytime something was bad in the Past I would sort of deny it reject it and it would come back to me like an avalanche or some painful hurricanes, I would stiffle, panick and still not be okay to let go to admit it and to find another way out of this...
Denial...

Abundance is when I finally accept myself inside out, that everything gently improve
when I stopped wanting it all at once
when I just live and love now
Abundance is ending the fight not because we think it's lost or tiring but because it's better to live what is and focuse on the beauty.

I have worries, I have sorrows in my present time, I dont write much about them lately because I have been changed, I have walked another stage.
I bend but never break.
Some of my paintings and poems still cry for me, but I smile, I cherish I savour and I Love, yes I love and pour my heart deeply
no matter what.
Maybe I am wrong maybe I'll be hurt, and also maybe I often still I dont get enough for all the things I give.
But abundance is acceptance and not obsession of the wanting, it is giving freely...because each time I have lived in the capricious me me me wanting more, why am I not seen, why me, why do I feel this alone, why my ache, why not hearing me, it leads to painful obsession,and the downward spiral.
Sure venting is good relieving, but one must for their own sake remember the gratefulness the path of Lights...
not that the hurt and sorrows should be erased and forgotten because of the beauty and love we get back of course not.
but to alleviate the load of the missings and aching sorrows maybe celebrating what we have here and now: Love, friendship, soul sisters, family,health, beautiful home sweet home, money to eat and treat ourselves,skills,qualities,beauties and so forth...
Maybe the way out is through remembering why we still can smile, why things are still worth it!
Abundance also comes more easily when one stop thinking of others way to think after how we behave, how we think,how we write etc
abundance comes with freeing our soul from any judgement even the worste: our own;)
and this applies well to myself, as I am so mean to myself at times.

Abundance is the avalanche of imagination crashing sweetly in my attic mind, the rain of shooting stars, the hopes that are still there, abundance is being healthy,not that ugly,rather brainy, being aware of our skills, beauty and celebrating them not being ashamed because others will say you're showing off you're narcissistic and other bullshits because these judgements are their own insecurities!

I am not a self centered over narcissistic woman, I am not a " better than thou" kind of person, even if I acknowledge the soul I am and show myself.
I resist any judgements because mine can be so cruel, but I'm making peace, I'm more gentle to myself than it used to be:)
the fact I receive amazing flows of compliments emails and sweet kindness always touch and surprise me, I am not all blah and think it is just fair enough.
I am surprised.
not even that I dont deserve it, I dont want to work this way anymore. I want to accept the love, the compliments, the welcoming feeling of soul sisters, friends out there.
It is abundance, it is beautiful.
I am so grateful for that. each of your words, comments,sweetness, make me smile, it means a lot to me always and you are thought of and remembered, you touched my heart my dearest friends!

Abundance is opening the doors to your soul garden, to search and give what you want to get back. to plant the flowers you want to see blooming in your own heart.

thank you Mich for this questionning, I always enjoy thinking after your posts!

8 commentaires:

Rebecca a dit…

Helene, Thank you so much for visiting Gratitude Practices. Your beautiful post is so moving. You write of your journey with great passion and inspiration. This has given me much to think about. I will visit again!

Blessings
Rebecca

Marie a dit…

Helene, I think you've described abundance better than anyone I've heard. My favorite: Abundance is when I finally accept myself inside out...and the "avalanche of imagination" (that's a nice visual)...you have such a love affair with words, don't you?

carole a dit…

Helenina:
I believe you to be such a gentle searching soul. The line in you abundance that made my heart go "pitty pat" is "to plant the flowers you want to see blooming in your own heart." I t is easy for an older person (me at 58) to see the darling flower allowing herself to blossom. Your heart is HUGE!!! I like what Ms. Marie said too!!!
Love yourself totally darling because you are sPECAIL!!!
Warmly
carole
Bare feet are so cool : )

Hélène Deroubaix a dit…

thanks for all the kind comments:-)
I will visit your blog again too Rebecca:)

blessings***

Sacred Suzie a dit…

I love where your spirit is taking you, I can see you developing and growing here! It's a beautiful thing. Continue with that flow, don't resist and open up like the beautiful flower you are.

Valaine a dit…

This is how I feel "Some of my paintings and poems still cry for me, but I smile, I cherish I savour and I Love, yes I love and pour my heart deeply
no matter what." You write so close to my own heart.

Mich a dit…

You have such a beautiful soul!

mich
x.

welcome to my universe a dit…

Hi Helene, I found your blog via Mich at Rainbow Dreams. I have not contributed yet, but I have been inspired to create a blog especially for my spiritual journey. I love this post of yours on abundance.

"Abundance is the avalanche of imagination crashing sweetly in my attic mind, the rain of shooting stars, the hopes that are still there" - this is such beautiful poetry - I have written it down in my collection of 'poetry I love'

You have helped me to understand abundance, how to accept and love myself and others and then watch it all coming right back at me.

Thank you.