Back to the basics

my Illustration friday: Moon
it's nothing amazing,hope to find time to do something else:)




bigger size



a colorful background

Now answering to Mich always inspiring spiritual post that helps me orientate my sharings of soul.
"
A new moon teaches gradualness and deliberation and how one gives birth to oneself slowly. Patience with small details makes perfect a large work, like the universe."
Rumi

The Moon card invokes the mother archetype in each human being, so tonight I ask these questions:"

Are you safe?

It depends, this question opens such a vaste space.
I have felt very unsafe on this planet after the 11th september event.
I also lived a very located tornado, well surely nothing like the twisters there are in the usa but as I was not used to that kind of weather at this truly shocked me very much.
since that event I had anxiety disorder I also have lived a sort of mild amnesia of the year 1999/2000 because too many things happened, I'm not even sure it was at those time...

then during depression I had this sensation this feeling that things were not straight, how to put it, I felt the world was rickety,I mean bent , I can not explain, but walking I often felt dizzy when I thought about it, as if our planet was not in its axis

My life was weird, I remember avoiding university a lot.

Nowadays I don't always feel safe, but safer than I used to.
well I'll never feel as safe as in childhood & teens, because we're aging and seeing everything with more acuracy.
I feel safe with my person, with my life, I try not to care about what others will think of me except from my friends and family of course but I do what I want, and live the way I want to.
I am still trying to feel safer thanks to being more balanced, making peace with everything in me about me, accepting my eccentricities, flaws etc.



Do you help to create a safe environment in which others may thrive?

I try to embellish reality,not to deny it not to reject it but to make it a better place. I try my best I guess to make a difference even a tiny one, I scatter roses of the soul here and there to bloom, I take care of my own garden and it spreads beyond hopefully.


Are you comfortable in the darkness of your own soul?

I think pretty much. It again depends on my strength and energies at the moment. Sometimes I can be comfortable in darkness because I get the awareness that I have to get trough and clean, shed some lights and sparks.
My own soul will never betray me and for that wherever I am I'll be ok.
I know our spirits have their own seasons and I believe we learn evolve and enjoy in those contrasts.

I am safer in the darkness of my own soul than in the dark alone boooooooh ;oP
I'm like children, I think of ghosts and such ahah, and I see the shadows faces oooooh and each tiny noises is perceived as potential danger, I'm a real paranoid neurotic ahahah


Are you protective of those who are especially vulnerable among us?

Of course!
I am not a mother yet physically but it's all inside of me, I am very protective,worried for my beloved ones, I love taking care,listening,helping
It is not only to say yes nice I'll be useful!
I love being useful and giving meaning to my existence in doing good things,improving things,spreading the lights around, but I mostly prefer to take care of my beloved ones.
I just know my empathy is big and whenever someone needs comforting my door are wide open because I know what Pain means, I know the suffering of the soul, the lacks, the needs

I also love vulnerability, I feel I'm a teacher even if I also can learn so much still by other teachers, I am one at my own stage of life.
so I enjoy being able to teach people the ways to find and build their own weapons( strength)
my only rewards in this is to have been able to make some feel better, feel themselves and happy to be who they are.
It is important for me that people know how to love themselves,inner peace and being fine with one's life is the path to Peace.


Do you take good care of yourself?
yes I do, I think it's very important.
I was so wrong when I was younger.
Obsessed to save souls to forget myself, to live useful only and live for others because I hated myself, this life,mine especially
everything was so painful, I felt a healing break in Empathy but that was not the better way to be me, to live my life,to love myself and create my own bliss!

Now I do take care of myself
mostly my soul, I think I have let aside my body too much due to being a cerebral.
I have thought the mind was enough.
I thought growing spiritually was enough to feel balanced.
Now I am seeing things differently.
I am trying to take care of my body, listen to it more.
healing my root chakra.
I'm feeling much better. I love taking care of myself in general,dressing up,make up etc
but less and less nowadays surely because I dont go out much and dont have a social life.

I really hope things will change soon.
I take care of myself with an healthy life: healthy food, healthy sleep, meditation,yoga, I think I should do more sports thoughts
I have walks out with sebastien but I should bike or swim, maybe jogging? but I dont like it much...
I also take care of myself, listening closely to my inner self, making the right choices, asserting myself,not being ashamed of my feelings and way of thinking.
I think I've grown a better friend in me with time.

Thank you Mich for those questions:)
feel free to answer if you want to:)

Your true self

found something interesting to write about today at Marie's blog from
Mich's blog:


1. What does your original face look like?
2. Who is your true self?
3. Are you radiant and glowing? I'm glowing now!!

1)My original face look like a fae child covered with cherry red flowers, I feel it's also sometimes two sided maybe, or maybe do I have two faces? something like the comedia dell'arte mask...My true face is better seen in the eyes of Love may it be family,lover,soul sisters and friends...
so it is not easy to answer...I am glad most of the time about what I see in the mirror but I know that when I feel plain and don't really care to take care of my appearance I still have the light of my soul and I hope people can sense that...
we can be tired, plain, ugly,with dirty hair, too fat here and there, have imperfection but we can be so beautiful at the same time in our words,actions and sharing...
I think that most of the time my inner self is aligned to my outer self because I try to share my inside outside, I try to embellish everything and remember the lights from within ,expand,scatter,spread again and again...that is one of my reasons to live I guess...

and this leads me to thinking of how much we spend wasting time on "others" not in the good sense, I mean, wasting time envying ,feeling angry, rejecting, wanting to hurt, being jealous, comparing...
I am not the wisest witch of light, I do fail sometimes I am faillible, I have been jealous envious I have wasted time on these paths, wasting energies to concentrate on my self, on my own path and being focused...
I wonder why we do that?
is it a way to give ourselves excuses?
we can ache on what others have when maybe it would just be better to see what we already have and that anything is possible,we can work to have what we really want...

We have our own gifts, beauty, things to share, we all have our own qualities, lights to offer and this can do a lot of good, this can actually change this world to some extent, making another one smile, feel understood and so forth...
we grow in this...
but it's not an obsession, it is free and natural,spontaneous and surely more and more if people cross my path if I have things to share, I don't just help to help...I used to be so obsessed with this like that song by alanis


I always should remember this anytime I feel doubtful and not sure I am where I want to be, too late not there yet etc
After all I still can see what I have already achieved and maybe I'm just too in a hurry, maybe it's no use running, maybe taking the zen path to where we want to arrive is wiser because we will go there finally,we're working for it, and the process is as interesting and enriching as the arrival...is there a real arrival (?)


2) My true self is what you see if you can see through me, my work, my poetry, my photos.
My true self is me in general, me lost in deepness and beauty.
I think I am a sort of witch of light, learning and teaching, searching and knowing
I am real , I know my flaws failure, I think I talk spontaneous, I am very honest...
I don't claim to be better than anyone, I know my limits, I push them if it's good for me and in respect with all that I cherish.
My true self is a mirror for my sisters, I try to make other women see inside themselves, get to know themselves, get to be real and very honest, share their naked soul and be fearless...
I never intend to show off or just be for the display though I dont deny narcissism and loving myself, but I am not intoxicated with myself or too self centered.
I think a life without giving and loving is empty and such a waste so yes I take care of myself,but I am glowing and radiating only when I love,when special persons/souls make me want to give, share my world with them, when I want to do good for others freely and with no strings attached...

I am often a little annoyed or perhaps upset when seb thinks I am too narcissistic and self centered, well I know he would not be with me if he thought so ,but sometimes he plays jokes on this and well it does not make me laugh:oP mean sebastien!!!
I am good sincerely I am doing good and wanting to do good and not just to look good, because seriously most of the time I just don't give a fuck about what people think of me and the way they will interprete me
I care about my sisters out there my beloved ones only and of course their eyes on me count a lot, if they can live and love me with my flaws, breaks and everything I am then I'm safe and blessed ;)

Talking about beloved ones , see what my dearest sébastien did for me?? ;o)
yes he did my beautiful layout! I have been the art director for it though ;o)( kidding, no sincerely he did the best of it!!)
what do you think?

he also did the blog of my dearest Jen:
jen new layout

Now I have told sebastien he could do a small business with this, so if anyone is interested in getting his banners, complete layouts etc, just ask he will do something ;)
for now I think we'll begin this little business with special orders, if people have ideas of what they would like on their blog, the colors elements they would like on it, seb will do it.

seb can also create banners for your (etsy)shop for instance, logo for your artworks if you need, or visiting cards, if you have any ideas of requests feel free to let us know and tell your friends!!!
(we might be in the financial shit in september so...let's spare money right now!!)
his interview to work as a graphist/webdesigner today went well so he has to wait them to call back hopefully next week!
It's a three months job but better than nothing.